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“It does not matter how long you are spending on the earth, how much money you have gathered or how much attention you have received. It is the amount of positive vibration you have radiated in life that matters.” ― Amit Ray

I suppose it’s a little unusual to hear that a person meditates, depending on who you hang out with and assuming most of these people are not monks. In fact, until a few months ago I didn’t meditate or know anyone who did. Or at least anyone who talked about it.

But then the load of the world and all the radical problems in it that felt absolutely oppressive to me started to weigh in on my spirit. They were not troubles of the sort I had ever known before. This wave of chaos felt overpowering and mighty, damn near suffocating.

Some may call it a “mid life thing” though I’m only 35. I would be ok with that except that it conjures up ideas that perhaps I want to blow my 401k on a sleek sports car and run off with a younger man. I do not wish, in any way, to do either of these things. And I don’t believe I am in the middle of my life. I do believe I’m on the verge of a transformed life, however.

I’d like to call it an awakening. I don’t know how else to describe it in a way that does it justice. An awakening of my mind to what really matters, my heart to what Love is, and my spirit to the infinite power within to heal, forgive and grow. It’s actually really groovy. And I’m not sure if it’s because I am sending out positive vibes or happen to be attracting like minded individuals, but it feels like this concept of “waking up” is extremely pervasive these days.

On some level, we all seek peace. Practicing stillness allows peace to settle in with me.

The trick is to keep in connection with this newly emerging inner spirit. Because it’s lovely to wake up, so to speak, to the truth of what it means to be loving, powerful, grateful and content but almost immediately the ego threatens to tear it all apart. In a world that seems to chant more, more, more, it can be maddeningly difficult to stay true to your soul that’s whispering “be still, let go, just breathe.”

In meditation, I’m learning to be deliberately very still. It’s called a practice because it’s sometimes quite hard to do! Even once you get it, you still have to keep at it regularly to be able to keep doing it. Wildly enough though, it’s addictive in a very cool way. The peace within is the greatest peace there is. The power in calm is tremendous and cleansing.

I practice my meditations in a space in my home. Then, I go out and live in the same world I lived in the day before with all of it’s pressures, jealousy, and greed. But I don’t see things in the same way anymore. Now I see these things for what they really are: projections of fear. And I know that within myself I can access the expansive power of love instead. Having this knowledge saves me from a lot of pain. And if I did not practice meditation everyday, the connection to this inner peace would be fuzzy at best, broken at worst.

A New Level of Knowledge

This is why I meditate. Because I may or may not be mid-life but I am at a place in my life where I’m certain that the problems created by an egocentric lifestyle cannot be solved with the same level of knowledge I used to create them. I believe it’s time to seek a new level of knowledge. A knowledge that can only come from surrendering my plans and purpose to a higher, deeper, more conscious truth.

I am not a devoutly religious person. I do not attend church because it doesn’t feel quite right for me. Still, I am a curious and passionately spiritual person. In my very bones I am sure there is a spirit within. Call it whatever feels true, the naming of this loving power is not nearly as important as discovering it’s force. It’s the spirit of everything that truly matters, of forgiveness, gratitude, peace and love.

I’ve heard people say they can access this inner spirit through creating art, exploring nature, surfing, praying, practicing yoga, keeping a gratitude journal, or any number of other practices that focuses the mind on the present moment. Anything that allows you to forgive your past, let go of the future, and just be present.

For me, it’s meditating. And I would encourage you to give it a try for yourself. I simply added a station to my Pandora called Calm Meditation Radio. Sometimes I use mantras and sometimes I focus on getting to that place beyond thought to just silence. Here are some simple mantras I picked up from Gabrielle Bernstein’s guidebook May Cause Miracles:

~ I am willing to see love instead of fear.

~ I am willing to let go of my self doubt.

~ Today I commit to miraculous shifts.

Meditation is not for everyone and that’s ok. I just wouldn’t want you not to try it because no one you know talks about it.

I love talking about it.

Peace, always.

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